Let’s talk about sex, baby

Them: “Do you know what you’re having?
Me: “A baby, I hope.”

When people warned me about the constant irritation of people wanting to know the sex of the baby, I kind of thought they were just a bit intolerant and over reacting a little. I get it now. The more people ask, the more I want to scream. Even one of my workmates, who didn’t find out the sex of her babe, is hassling me like crazy. (BTW – blogging folk – you don’t count…you, my friends, are entitled to know everything.)

Ducks and I kind of backed ourselves into a corner with the whole sex/ultrasound thing. I stupidly told my mother that we thought we would probably would find out. Then I tried to pedal out of it by saying that we were reconsidering…but by then it would be too late. Then people started saying that they ‘needed’ to know the sex so they could find us appropriately gendered baby stuff and on it went…

The reality is that we really do want to find out the sex of little Squeak. We’re a household of women – even all 3 of our pets are girls and we’re finding it difficult not to use female pronouns when talking about Squeak (though Ducks is waaaaayyy worse than me!). And if we are having a boy, then there is going to be a bit of adjusting to do. Not because we wouldn’t be thrilled to have a boy but just because it’s so far out of feminist, female, lesbian frame of reference.

So the answer is yes. We will be having one more ultrasound and we will be finding out the sex. And after feeling resistant and reluctant to share the sex with others (that sounds dirty doesn’t it!!?), we have decided that we will be telling everyone too. Despite how annoying all the questions are, I think people are genuine in their excitement and only want to share it with us.

But god help anyone who asks me if we’re going to find out the gender! Maybe it’s the sociologist in me, but my sex and gender lecture is something you probably don’t want to be subjected too!

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6 Comments

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6 responses to “Let’s talk about sex, baby

  1. Bring it on (the sex and gender lecture, that is!). One of my pet peeves, too.

  2. Att

    Hahaha, wonderful answer to the question. I shall put that in the rolodex of my brain.

  3. I totally hear you on the sex/gender thing! I can understand why people ask – there are only so many things you can know about a fetus, so that’s one of them, but I get why it would be annoying. Not to mention that I would be afraid to tell people because I don’t necessarily want the appropriately gendered gifts!

  4. yup, another sara

    I can frequently be heard yelling things like, “gender is a social construct!”

    We go back and forth about the issue of finding out the sex (for our theoretical pregnancy). But in the end, I can’t stand NOT knowing things that I *could* know (which has gotten me into lots of trouble in life), so I’m sure we will find out.

  5. Wow, I totally hear ya on this. We’re experiencing the same thing!!!! We’re going to find out too….it’s too exciting not to 😉

  6. I have to admit the gender and sex thing has been a bubble that recently burst for me…Always used the terms interchangeably, even though Ican talk endlessly about gender roles and stereotypes, i know the concepts but have been bad with definitions. In recent times lots of lovely blogs have lovely posts about gender vs sex that i have been enlightened (probably heightened by the lead up to our 22 wk sex revealing scan!)

    Feel like a bit of a nuff nuff for my use of wrong words and definitions (especially that really long post I wrote ages ago on our blog)

    But i feel very grown up now..Even though I am sure IRL I would unintentionally (and reluctantly) end up in the audience for your sex and gender lecture!

    and i am excited you will be finding out the sex and sharing the info…have you got names sorted already?

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