18 week belly pic

Today officially sucks. Technically my day off, I’ve spent most of it writing a submission for work – due on my coordinators desk tomorrow morning. How wonderful then that after a morning of writers block and a frantic couple of hours after lunch where it all came together, that my computer froze and AutoRecover resuscitated the 10am version of the document.  Firmly in denial, I’ve just eaten  half a block of chocolate and taken a belly shot.

sleeplessness

Thanks to a generous tax return, we bought a new bed yesterday.  Our current bed is only 6 years old but is also only a double and wayyyyyy too small for the 2 of us. Ducks is a cuddle monster and chases me to the very edge of the bed most of these cold winter nights. Though we don’t plan to co-sleep in the strictest sense, we will be side-carring Squeaks cot (crib) to our bed and I’m conscious that there will be nights when Squeak sneaks in with us. There is no way that the 3 of us could ever survive in that bed. In recent months, said bed has also developed the most hideous of squeaks – to the point that the tiniest move wakes up the whole house. Rolling over is and event and sex in that bed is simply out of the question!

No one told me about the extent of pregnancy insomnia. I certainly never expected to have it from so early on but it’s honestly been 15 weeks since I’ve had two decent nights sleep in a row. I was never a puller of all nighters – not for study nor for partying.  I never thought I’d be so well acquainted with 2am – 5am but alas, I am. It’s a strange paradox because there aren’t many nights where I can stay conscious much beyond 8pm either. If only there was some happy medium. That said, aside from the exhaustion, I’m feeling pretty darn great and not at all entitled to complain. I love my pregnant pedestal and my emerging belly. I love that despite the wearyness, people tell me that I’m glowing.  And I really love the little feet that keep butting my insides. For a couple of weeks I wasn’t convinced that it was anything more than gas or nausea but in the last week, I’ve really learned to tell the difference. It’s been wonderful and even Ducks has felt it once.

Anyway – the new bed… It’s bigger, does not Squeak and is super comfortable. Delivery won’t be for a couple of weeks because we’re having some drawers built in (yay for storage!!). Until then, I’ll be counting sheep and putting all my faith for a good nights sleep into our new bed.

why work?

I am almost as excited about giving up my job as I am about having this baby. Seriously. I plan to finish at about 36 weeks and am already counting down. It doesn’t help that work is sucky and everyone there is miserable right now. It also doesn’t help that I’m finding it more challenging than my pregnant brain can manage. And it certainly doesn’t help that people who have been there for way less than my 4 years (1 year voluntary, 3 years paid) have come and gone because of the same said misery.

It’s not that I’m not deeply committed to the cause of my work (I work for a small womens NGO), it’s just that in a tiny workplace, with crappy resources, ridiculous budgetary constraints and too much work for too few hours/dollars, everyone burns out eventually. That most of us have burnt out at the same time is really unfortunate because in trying to lessen each others misery/load, we’re all finding ourselves taking too much personally. It seems that there are some great cons to a workplace that is genuinely caring and supportive.

It’s weird to think that middle class women, just a generation ago, gave up work as soon as they were pregnant – often as soon as they were TTC.  My Mum thinks I’m amazing to still be working. As happy as I am that women are now able to continue with their careers during their childbearing years, I so wish that it wasn’t about the financial imperative which, for many of us, it certainly is.

And in much more exciting news, we bought a pram today. A Valco Rad with bassinet, on eb.ay. We aren’t quite ready for big ticket purchases but I couldn’t go past this bargain – it’s almost new and we got it for $200. It retails for $700! The catch is that it’s in another state and city – fortunately though, a city where one of my best friends lives and where I just happened to be planning a weekend jaunt in the coming weeks. Yay.

It’s bedtime for me. Must sleep so I can go to work and earn $$ to pay for impulse eb.ay purchases!

vanity post

I’ve just looked at my belly pics via my work computer and notice that my big wide screen makes me look short, fat and very stumpy. I don’t like it at all. Is it my computer or does this happen on all wide screens? I like what I see when I view via my 15inch (or is it 17?) Macbook screen…it’s much more flattering and representative of what I’m happy to put out into the blogosphere. Ah the vanity…

too exciting!

These girls deserve all the smiles and well wishes they can get! Finally their time has come! Congratulations Vee & Jay! xxoo